Does your child always get stubborn with you? Does he always insist on getting what he wants? The suggestions we have prepared for you can help you overcome this situation.
Recently, one of our readers said that his child is constantly stubborn both in his family life and in his social life. He mentioned that when he doesn't get what he wants, he pulls himself into a corner and withdraws. As such, we took up this issue and did a little research. I hope it will be an article that will help parents with similar problems.
We'll tell you how to deal with this problem, citing quotes from a few books. First of all, your child's age is very important in such cases, age is at the forefront in both emotional and psychological development. The reason is that as children get older, they gain some abilities and skills. Our reader's child is five years old. At this age, children have developed sense of self and become full of desire to do something on their own. It manifests itself with such behaviors especially at this age.
- They want to choose their own clothes.
- They resist not to eat the food they don't want.
- When he is stubborn with you, his attitude towards his parents is harsh.
- They set the rules in games and want to lead the group.
- They want to have their own rules at home, in the park and on the playgrounds.
When we look at it this way, every situation where your child wants to set his own rules is actually a developmental process brought by his age. This process shows that it is growing healthy. For some children, it is the result of leadership character. It is useful to consider the character of the child.
Should children be limited?
Children love boundaries and order. You should explain this to your child. You have to teach him that there are things he can and cannot do.
Factors other than age and character
If your child started this situation when he was 3-4 years old and it becomes unbearable as time goes by, it may be because of your approach to your child. For example; If you exhibit attitudes such as "oh my child should eat two more spoons", "don't cry", "don't let anything happen to him", children will use this situation. Over time, he learns that he can use this situation whenever he wants by turning it to his advantage and continues to be stubborn with you. If there is stubbornness even though you do not treat your child in this way, there are siblings, cousins, etc. in the environment. He may have observed it and applied it himself. Once he realizes that it works, he can use it.
How can the stubborn child problem be solved?
In cases of stubbornness, do not constantly point out the problem to your children by emphasizing it. The further you go, the bigger the problem. Children may not be able to make cognitive inferences like adults. Therefore, the repeated emphasis on error serves no purpose other than reinforcing the wrong behavior.
Especially if your child gets irritable, cries and cuts off communication with you when there is nothing he wants at home. First of all, you need to be calm. It is very helpful to be calm with your child. The next step is to give your child time to calm down. Get down to your child's eye level and tell him that you understand him and that he should be calm now and talk when he calms down. After this conversation, get away from him physically, this is important for him to think about this situation. Do not talk about this with anyone in the house while you take this distance. When your child calms down, calmly explain why "what he wants won't happen". If your child does not understand you and continues to be stubborn, calmly walk away again.
This process can be difficult and tiring. The important thing here is to be stable while the process is going on. If you get bored, angry and give your child what he wants, you will reinforce this situation.
I hope it was a useful writing.
You can also share your experiences and solutions to similar problems in the comments section below.